I Can't Say In Words How much, or Why I love you... But you can read this, and everything I do... And hopefully you'll know the answers someday.

How many people feel that the person who loves them, and who they love... saved their lives? Rescued them from something that had killed their spirit, or nearly ended their lives?

I think all the time... Maybe too much. I think about my life, and how it's changed over and over again... Sometimes for the better and others not so much. I think about the way I am and why I am that way.

It's amazing, love I mean. The first time you say those three words to anyone, my gosh, it's so easy to believe you mean it. It's so easy to imagine good things and to let yourself go with childish illusions because of a lack of malice and wisdom. A rough moment and then it's so easy to despise that same person you only "said"those words to.

It's indescribeable though, the first time you say those three words to one person... and mean it with everything in your soul and your heart. To love someone because you DO love them... Not because you love the thought of loving them... Am I confusing you?

I think about my life before you... It's true, I felt like I had nothing to live for. I was broken, and down. I was wounded, and nothing was ever going to bring me out of it. I was worth nothing, atleast I didn't think so.

And for some reason, I don't quite know... A call a day, your voice on that phone. I looked forward to something, a bit of light to help me forget for a while what I'd been through, and how alone I felt. You became what I looked forward to each day. And I didn't know why, and "love" was not quite yet something I had in mind... But you made me feel alive again. I saw you like an angel, there to show me that I'm not alone, and that I do matter.

Dramatic right? I mean all was not lost. I had my family and life. No friends though, not real ones. No one to trust or who'd understand me or who'd even listen.

And we started growing together. Sharing more and more, bonding. A bond that grows stronger as we grow together.

You mended me baby, it's true. But I'm not broken anymore. I'm not weak. You've helped me see that I am worthy of respect, and honesty, and devotion. You've helped me see that I can pick myself up now when I fall, regardless what caused me to. And now I can be strong for you too, I am strong for you as I am for me. I can be there for you when you need me now, in a way I could not when I was broken.

I can't say I'm perfect, at times sadness and pain do bring me down. I do breakdown... Don't we all? I do need you baby, I need you every second of my life. But not to keep me from breaking, or falling. Not just for support. But because I need to share my life with you and love you and I need your love too.

Life. When I say life, I mean that thing we do everyday regardless of how we feel or of how much we don't feel like it anymore.

Living. That's what I call it when you can trully enjoy and embrace that which I defined above, life. When you can't ask for more, you have all you've ever dreamt of. You bring me joy baby, laughter, healing, peace, warmth. You are all that is good in my life.